Beer Haiku Friday and Making Love in a Canoe

Today’s haiku combines three of my favourite topics (beer, poetry and Homer Simpson) into just 17 glorious syllables. It is called “Homer Haiku“:

Cause and solution
Of life’s infinite problems
Poured in a pint glass

The latest Malthouse blog also covers more of my favourite subjects – American pale ale, US foreign policy, Sierra Nevada – and some of my less favourite topics – Bud Light, Urkel and Oprah – in just one post “American beer is like making love in a canoe“:

American beers have an appalling reputation internationally based on the fact that 80% of them are, in fact, nonsense on stilts. This was certainly the reputation that Monty Python was lampooning in the line which now serves as the title of this blog post. However, that same accusation of mainstream mediocrity can be levelled at a number of countries around the world. Often a nation’s most popular or most famous beer is hardly their best offering. Both those generalisations apply fully to New Zealand.

Glass Tip – Beer Haiku Daily and Malthouse Blog

One thought on “Beer Haiku Friday and Making Love in a Canoe”

  1. Gosh Neil, as an American I don't know if I should say thank you or f#*k off! Maybe I'll just point out a few things.

    First the word Y'all is no more annoying than being referred to as “Mate” by other men. Sorry guys, I only mate with women.

    Second, who cares what Canadians think. They are responsible for giving the world Moosehead and Labatts!

    Next, yes every country has its crap beers and NZ has its share. Steinlagers, Lion, Tui, Export, DB, Waikato Heck, you even import crap beer from other countries and make beer like Heineken even worse. On top of that you try to pass off Tui as an East India Pale Ale and don't get me started on the whole Radler deal.

    As for Robert the bar guy, once again you are correct. I can't count the times I've tried to talk customers into a Croucher Hef or Tuatara IPA, only to have them get a Heiny. Or even worse ask “what do ya got thats like Lion Red” to which I want to reply “I could piss in a bottle and chill it down for you”

    The most correct statement you made was about American craft beers. They are amongst the best in the world. I can't tell you how happy I was to see Rouge and Flying Dog at Beervana. I also see that The Beer Store has New Belgium, Deschutes, Abita and tons more U.S. brews. Add to this the role that Americans like Brian Theil of Renaissance Brewery and others are playing in the NZ craft beer revolution and I think you could say that the canoe has landed.

Leave a Reply